What to read to understand friendship

Ulysses by James Joyce (1920)

To George Bernard Shaw, it was “foul-mouthed and foul-minded”, but to me Ulysses is a beautiful compendium of human warmth. From the opening pages, we find friendship to be a font of humour and a saving grace, with Buck Mulligan teasing our man Stephen Dedalus. But it’s the friendship between old and young, between experience and innocence, that gives the book its soulful life. I adore the relationship between Leopold Bloom and Stephen, and despite the “separating forces” between them (name, age, race and creed), their conversation returning to Bloom’s kitchen at Eccles Street is deep. “Footstep”, “bellchime” and “handtouch” all remind Bloom of the echoing marvel that is old friendship.

A Taste of Honey by Shelagh Delaney (1959)

There has to be something fortifying about a good friendship, and this is perfectly presented in Shelagh Delaney’s little masterpiece of a play. Just when you think things look hopeless for the feisty and befuddled Jo – and that her life will be all about her mother – she meets Geoff, a young, gay art student who knows how to look after her. The play explores the problem that you can’t choose your family, and shows that friends, even in banishment, may provide the best relief.

The Boundless Deep by Richard Holmes (2025)

This brilliant new biography of the young Alfred, Lord Tennyson is a book about poetry, science and belief, but it is also a marvellous study of the friendships that sustained and challenged the Victorian poet. One was with his college friend Arthur Hallam, whose death at 22 provided the occasion for Tennyson’s passionate and epic In Memoriam. Richard Holmes’s book is packed with insights about the romance of fellowship, also unfolding Tennyson’s vivid friendship with Edward FitzGerald, “Old Fitz”, who translated The Rubáiyát of Omar Khayyám. Holmes’s book shows you how such complicated alliances can shape a life.

Andrew O’Hagan’s On Friendship is published by Faber & Faber (£12.99). Order a copy from The Observer Shop for £11.04. Delivery charges may apply

Photography by H Armstrong Roberts/ClassicStock/Getty Images